No guilt

Many of my posts have been chock full of apologies for not posting. (Who reads this anyway?)

A dear friend of mine took the time to tell me not to worry about being consistent on my blog. She told me to post when is convenient for me. So, off you go Guilt. Leave this place. There is no room for you here.

On that note, let's talk some more about casting off guilt. I'll spread it out over a few categories.

~Emotional~

The problem: I am an impatient person. I get anxious and easily excited about something. So, naturally, waiting in anticipation of something drives me nuts. Sometimes people do too. I can be short of temper. This results in having an attitude with my parents, yelling at my brothers, or saying something spiteful to a friend. Afterwards, I feel terrible. No one likes inflicting pain on others (if you do, you have psychological problems).

Casting it off: As embarrassing and humbling as it is, apologizing works wonders. Take the time to let people know you're sorry for hurting them. And let people know you appreciate them! I know how much it hurts to feel unappreciated. One approach I took was to write a letter to a family member and leave it under their pillow for them to find. That's a nice way to say what you need to say without the awkwardness of saying it face to face.

~Physical~

The problem: I used to do taekwondo, but I haven't trained for about two years. It felt so good to go in to the school twice a week and get a really hardcore work-out. I prided myself in being able to do crunches for who knows how long and punch a bag for 5 minutes straight without faltering. I am not keen on the idea of trying that now for fear of failing. To top it all off, I've never been good at running, so I can't do that either.

Casting it off: Since my schedule is so busy and I can never seem to find time to exercise, I have trouble casting off this guilt. BUT I am finding little ways to feel better about myself. As silly as this sounds, shower daily. Yeah I know most of us do this anyway, but actually think about it. Relax while you're showering. Try not to think about your schedule or what's bothering you. Think about the warm water splashing off your head, clearing your pores, and refreshing your soul................... aaaaah. If a shower's not physically healthy, I don't know what is. Another thing I've tried is doing 25 crunches right before every shower. Those are great for making your tummy smaller. Directly affecting your physical health? I think yes. One more thing on the physical note. Smaller portions. I like food. Lots of food. I eat food. Lots of food. Food is yummy. So... slow down with your food. Enjoy that bite. Chew it slowly and purposefully. If you savor your food, you'll actually eat less. What a great way to enjoy your meal while still being healthy!

~Spiritual~

The problem: I think this section can speak for itself. Yeah, we sin. A lot. All day, every day. No wonder we feel guilty about this one. It's directly spiritual in the sense that sometimes we don't appreciate church. We go because it's routine. Things like that. As if that's not enough to get our guilt machine going, the emotional and physical guilt also ties in to this. Dang.

Casting it off: As cliché as this sounds... read. your. bible. I hardly ever take the time to read God's word. Right now is Lent; a time of prayer and fasting. As well as giving something up this year (caffeine if you're wondering), I've also decided to do something this year. I'm working my way through the gospel of Matthew every day. I'm also doing a daily devotional. I have found this to be extremely refreshing and incredibly beautiful. I'm learning how to incorporate God in to my every day life. Another thing to do is really focus on church. Whatever denomination you are, think about why you are there. This morning at mass, I almost started crying. I was a Eucharistic minister today and I was serving wine. I suddenly became so excited to be sharing the blood of Jesus with my community. I was so joyful and I could feel Jesus' joy at my being so in love with Him at that moment. So take the time to see that beauty. If you can't, as God to help you. And most importantly, know that He is a merciful God and ask Him for forgiveness.

A lot of guilt comes from these mindsets: "I need to do this" or "I need to do that." "I didn't do this" or "I didn't do that." St. Therese of Lisieux focused on the little things. What if we did as well? Start with a few small things that you "need" to do. Don't look at that huge workload in front of you. Do things one at a time. Then, appreciate the things you've already done. Be satisfied that you found the time to call that friend or wash that dish today. Then build from there.

Now go out there and live life. Laugh, cry, apologize, forgive, exercise, pray... plus more!

As many activities as there are leaves on my lawn

It seems like every post says something like this:

"I've failed my readers once again"

"I missed the post for last month"
"Oh darn it, I forgot to write on my blog"

What is going on here?
I suppose I have priorities... More important things to do... Like facebo-- uhhh I mean, homework.

So here I am (again) posting late.

Well, the big update would be... I'm 16 now. I celebrated my 16th birthday this weekend with many of my friends and my immediate family. My party was New York themed. Pretty classy right? We all wore fancy clothes and ate yummy food. It was a hit worthy of Broadway.

I also got the present I really wanted. No, not a car. A guitar! It's wonderful; a very pretty guitar with nice action and gorgeous sound. If you want specifics, it's a 2006 Taylor 812 CE. Acoustic electric.

Now let's back up to October. Halloween and fall activities went well. I got to hang out with my boyfriend (yes, I have a boyfriend ^_^) a few days in a row. We watched a movie and later in the week went to a haunted corn maze. And no, I wasn't the only scary thing in there. I got scared, he got scared, we both got scared, and we got lost. All in all: had a great time.

I was a mime for Halloween. I had the striped shirt, beret, and everything. I even painted my face white. The hardest part was not talking. I'm kind of talkative (if you haven't guessed already from my manner of speaking in my posts). I think I was able to keep my little mouth shut for close to 5 or 6 hours. Impressive.

At the beginning of this month, NaNoWriMo started. For all of you who have no idea what that is, I shall explain. (No it's not an anime convention). It is short for: National Novel Writing Month. A crazy month when aspiring authors all over the world try to write a 50,000 word novel in one month. I started doing it, but considering my birthday and party were the first weekend of this month, I lost a lot of time. I only have just over 4,000 words... It may seem like a lot, but compared to 50,000... let's just say I'm losing hope. I shouldn't be too hard on myself, because I've actually never done NaNoWriMo before, but I'm losing faith. I might just try writing my novel over several months instead of one. We shall see.

Hope your fall is colorful, crisp, and clean, plus more!

September Falling Leaves (and falling behind)

It's September. Schedules are changing as fast as the leaves on the trees. But some of us (cough*me*cough) are also falling behind like leaves falling from the trees.

I'm just barely scraping through with this post. September is almost over. But I've prevailed. I have not failed this time to meet the deadline for this month's post. So here I am with several things to report.

Before the school year got too hectic, I was lucky enough to get in a vacation and a camping trip.

My mom's side of the family got together at the beach. We rented a beach house for a weekend near the beginning of this month. We had a weekend full of fun.

I found that despite my only previous experience with fire being creating tissue paper models, I managed to build a wonderful fire.

I played on the beach with one of my little brothers. We found an abundance of seaweed and a piece of coral. I also drew a myriad of hearts in the sand.

We played games and watched movies as a family as well.

Overall, it was a wonderful weekend and I got to know my family better.

This last weekend, my immediate family went on a camping trip with my best friend's family. We stayed at a campsite next to a lake.

I once again put my newly discovered fire skills to good use.

The weather was hot, so I spent most of the second day chilling with my best friend. I also gave us both henna tattoos.

Later, she and I went out on the boat with her dad. He took us water tubing. Now that was great fun. It was bumpy and crazy and fast. We took the boat up to 40mph.

I also got a chance to do some star gazing. I watched the moon rise over the lake.

Overall, another great weekend.

Classes have also started back up again. This term, I am taking 2nd year Japanese and Biology 102. So far, everything's going well... but it's only the first week. Next week should be more difficult. We shall see.

As we continue further into this season of autumn; have a good school year, stay warm, drink coffee, enjoy the outdoors, watch the falling leaves.... plus more!

Really? -grumble-

I forgot a post for July? I? Forgot? A post? For.... JULY???? How could I? (Hey that rhymes...)

Oh goodness... When I said busy summer, I really meant it didn't I?

Well folks, let's give you an update shall we?

JULY

I went on a mission trip. It was great. I went with my church youth group (plus some more from another youth group) to Seattle, WA. We were there for almost a week. We sorted through clothes at a donation center for foster children, we served lunch to the guys at a drug rehab center, and packaged a bajillion won tons at a food share. As well as serving the community, I got to know many many great people.

AUGUST

I went to Polk County fair. I was showing rabbits, photography, art, educational displays, and I made two speeches. I had a prepared speech about demodex mites and the problems they can cause for dogs, and I did an impromptu speech. The impromptu speech was interesting. The topic I pulled out of the can was: "There are two spots left on Noah's ark. Choose from grizzly bear, ostrich, dolphin, elephant, or field mouse. You have to be the animal and explain why you deserve the last spot on the ark." Yep. I chose field mouse. It was pretty funny. Anyway, one of my educational displays and my art exhibit went to State fair. I was also selected to do my prepared speech and another impromptu speech at State.

Last week, I went to a horse camp. I met lots of awesome people and I got to ride a horse. Loved it. I learned some new things about riding and I got to do a basic barrel race at a trot. As well as horseback riding, there were all kinds of activities. Arts and crafts, bible study, free time, swimming at the lake... oh. And mucking stalls. That's great fun. I think the best part was the fact that my riding instructors quoted Monty Python and the Princess Bride. That totally made my week!

ANOTHER RANDOM UPDATE

I have a job! I'm working at a physical therapy place. They have several other offices in different cities. In the basement are stacks and stacks of boxes. The boxes are full of files... Seven years worth of patient files. My job is to scan all the files, one by one, in to the computer system. Yes, it's rather tedious, but at the same time very cool. It's my first real job, and a pretty good one at that. Much better than flipping burgers (no offense to anyone who is passionate about their burger-flipping job).

And that's about it. I shall not forget to update in September.

Hope you're all having a wonderful summer and looking forward to the new school year!

Enjoy last minute pool parties, ice cream cones, picnics... plus more!

Summer is Fresh

Well now, where to start...

I have had a great beginning of the summer. The Christian Leadership camp was great. I made many new friends and learned even more leadership skills.

I went to a multi-cultural festival here in town this weekend with one of my friends. We had a great time. :)

I am also looking forward to the mission trip this summer! It's coming up fast. Our team tie-dyed t-shirts to wear up in Seattle.

So far, I'm getting a fresh start to my summer. Speaking of fresh... I've put a fresh new design on my blog! I thought it was time for a change. Leave a comment with what you think.

Surprisingly, that's about it. Now that summer's here, I really don't have much to report. It's a nice break from my usually hectic life. I've been keeping busy talking to friends, playing and writing music, and doing spontaneous things... plus more!

And I failed... again

I created this blog because I didn't keep up my old one.

My goal was: Update this blog once a month

I have failed.

I didn't post even once during the month of April.
I feel I have let down my readers, but I've probably only let down myself. I have no idea how many people actually read this blog. Maybe I'm just posting on here for my own personal benefit. If I'm able to keep it up, it gives me the feeling that I can accomplish things. I also like to practice my writing skills.
So, if you read my blog, I hope you enjoy it at the very least. I also hope I haven't let you down in any way by missing my April post.
As it is, I am barely scraping the May post. It is after all Memorial day in just 2 days: the end of May. Oh my!
Where is this year going?

Anyway, I feel the need to update you (whoever you are) on my life.

I am still taking Japanese. I am nearing the end of this term and I'm nervous for my final. I shouldn't be nervous. I always do well. But I forget that.

I took an archery class for a few weeks. It was interesting. I say "interesting" because I'm not exactly sure how good I am. One day I get 6 bulls eyes in a row. The next, every shot I have is a foot away from my target. What happened there?
Nevertheless, I am going to try and continue archery in the fall.

Summer is getting closer. I feel like I'm looking forward to it even more than previous years. Though I have no idea why that is. Maybe because it's going to be full of all kinds of enjoyable activities.
In June, I'm going to a Christian leadership camp. Very cool. I enjoy leadership, so I can't wait for this chance to grow in those skills. I also get to see a very good friend of mine: a seminarian I met on a mission trip last summer.
Speaking of mission trips, I have another one in July! This year, we're going to Seattle. Yes, you can find poverty even there. I'm looking forward to helping the community up there. I'm also designing our team's t-shirt with another friend of mine.
In August, I get to go to a horse camp. I am very excited about that because I haven't been horseback riding in a *very* long time.
Between all these activities, I have also landed myself a summer job. I'll be working an office job, transferring patient files at a physical therapy place. Woo, exciting. But hey! It pays!
And when I'm not being a leader, a missionary, a horseback rider, or an office worker, I'll be hanging out with friends. I have great aspirations for coffee and jamba juice trips.

So there it is. My summer is chock full of randomness. And as a good friend of mine says, "randomness is the spice of life."

Looks like a spicy summer this year!

Hopefully, I won't be too busy to update my lonely blog. Even if I'm only writing to myself. Hmmm... hey. If you read my blog, leave a comment on this post.

Hope your summer is great! Have fun with swimming, jamba juice, beach trips, and popsicles... plus more!

This and that and this and that...

As it's been over a month since my last post, I have quite a bit of updating to do.

All during February and March, I was becoming overwhelmed with... well... everything. Although I was doing well in my Japanese and math classes, it seemed to be too much. Homework piled up along with various other things in my schedule. Yet, my faithful friends and family stuck by me like bugs on fly paper (even though I was not very pleasant). After much encouragement (and a little chocolate), I made it through Winter term and I still managed to scrape an A in both classes. What a relief. :)

I also just finished another great year of Shakespeare's Greatest Hits. It's a Christian homeschooling group of students grades 6-12 who put on two Shakespeare plays every year. This was my 3rd year in the program. We performed Henry V and Taming of the Shrew. As always, this has been a great experience. I've learned more about myself and my fellow actors as I do every year.

And speaking of acting, I am trying out for a play at the end of this month. Chemeketa is performing Alice's Adventures Underground this Spring. I am to try out for the main part of Alice. I don't need to memorize a monologue, but it might come in handy. I was going to memorize something from Our Town, but I seem to have lost my copy of that play. That could be a problem...

Anyway, moving on.

St. Patrick's Day was a few days ago... I completely forgot about it. I didn't wear green. I feel rather sad that I missed the chance to wear all the same color without people giving me funny looks. The shirt that I wore (luckily) did have a little bit of green on it. Though I wore my blue sweatshirt over it which resulted in a pinch from my Grandmother.

I've been busy with my music. I've written another song on the piano which gives me a total of six for that instrument. I still haven't written any of them down... they are all in my head. One of these days I'm going to forget one and it will be lost forever. I will grieve for it as if it died. So I should write them down (although I probably won't... darn procrastination...). I've been working on my guitar playing too. I learned how to play Blackbird, by The Beatles. I enjoy that one. I also wrote my own song on the guitar last night. I don't know what chords I'm playing. It's really just a bunch of random finger picking. I don't know how to write it down so there is no hope for me there. I'll just have to play it endlessly so I won't forget it (which will result in my family getting tired of it). If you'd like to know the name of the song and the lyrics, leave a comment on this post and I'll drop you an email.

Anyway, I think that just about sums up what I've been doing since my last post.
Tell me if my life is too dreary and I'll see what I can do to spice it up. ;)

What ever goes on in your life; enjoy all that goes on... plus more!